Iowa State vs. Oklahoma Recap: Close But No Cigar

“So, have you enjoyed the journey,” my dad asked. 

I had to pause. There were five minutes left in the second-to-last regular season game, and the last regular season road trip, so it was a fitting time to ask the question. Iowa State, however, had just given up a fourth quarter touchdown to go down 28-14 to Oklahoma. I wasn’t enjoying the journey very much at that moment.

It had surprisingly been a somewhat controversial week after ISU coach Matt Campbell told reporters it wasn’t his goal to win a Big 12 Championship. The Cyclones, the week prior, had given up almost all hope of that possibility in the loss at Texas Tech. As a fanbase, we seemed to collectively try to come to terms with the season that was, at the very least, not what we had hoped for. We wanted a Big 12 Championship. 

If there was any question whether the Cyclones would be flat or not play their hardest at Oklahoma, that was quickly put to rest as Iowa State played inspired, if not always pretty, football. There was no doubt Iowa State really wanted to win. And I really wanted them to win.

The reality I had been struggling with all week was that I wasn’t going to be writing a book about a Big 12 Championship team. I chose to do what I’m doing this year in part because I thought this was going to be the best team in school history, the team to finally get over the hump and win a conference championship. If I’m going to do it, this would be the year, I had thought. So when it looked like the effort to pull off one last memorable upset at Oklahoma was about to fall short, I wasn’t in the proper mood to reflect. My dad’s question forced me to confront the reality that I was disappointed. It also forced me to again shift my perspective.

“Ahhhh. Yeah, I’m enjoying it. It’s just… this has just been such a disappointing season,” I said. I paused. “I’m glad I did it. Today has been a lot of fun. Ask me in a little while and I’ll probably be feeling better.”

It had been fun. My dad and my brother, Kent, a big Hawkeye fan, had made the trip to Norman with me. Kent had even agreed to miss an Iowa home game to be part of this experience. We had met up with my friend Jason, his wife and some friends. Our group had enjoyed our time together Friday night in Oklahoma City and at the tailgate with the Cyclone Club of Dallas-Fort Worth on Saturday morning. At the tailgate, we had made more friends and said hello to now-familiar faces that I had met along the way. It was a festive atmosphere. 

But the game wasn’t quite living up to what I had wanted it to be, and the disappointment was seeping in.

Then, Iowa State did what this Iowa State team always seemed to do. Just when you counted them out, they pulled you right back in. The Cyclones scored a touchdown, forced a stop on defense and got the ball back with just a few minutes to set up a potential game-tying drive. It was so similar to how the Baylor, West Virginia and Texas Tech games had played out. Just do it this time, I thought. “This team doesn’t win easy or lose easy,” I told my dad.

Quarterback Brock Purdy found his favorite target, Charlie Kolar, over and over to push the ball down the field. The Cyclones converted one fourth down to keep the game alive, but faced another 4th-and-10 from the 21-yard line with less than 30 seconds left. Purdy took the snap, and for a brief second, I thought it was going to be a big play. Tight end Chase Allen looked to be open.

The sequence that followed reminded me of the other painful moments we had experienced in the season. Like when Purdy’s sure touchdown pass to Kolar was tipped and intercepted in the Baylor game before it could get to him. Or when Breece Hall’s sure touchdown run at West Virginia was ruled a fumble. Or when somehow Texas Tech drilled a 62-yard field goal to win. Those all gave me such sick feelings. Feelings that the team was so close to having the season we as fans had dreamed about. 

Purdy’s pass to Allen was a touch too high, and was intercepted. Another close, heartbreaking loss. 

I was numb. The play had happened right in front of our seats. I saw Kolar sitting on the goal line, looking dejected. Like he didn’t want to stand up. I saw Allen go and comfort him. Oklahoma took over possession, downed the ball, and the Sooners and their fans celebrated. I felt like I could feel the numbness, the sadness, emanating from the players as they walked off the field. 

I had some tears well up in my eyes as well. The emotions of the season were hitting me. Again, I was forced to confront the reality that my “dream season” was sitting at 6-5. The chance for another signature win was gone. 

I was disappointed, sure. More than that, I felt for the players. I felt for the parents of the players. Sports have this weird effect on fans. I didn’t know any of the players personally. I had met just a few of the parents in passing along the way of going to all the road games. And yet I felt so connected to them. I felt so connected to fellow Iowa State fans who so badly wanted a successful season, and a win on Saturday at Oklahoma. 

Sometimes we all put way too much meaning and emotion into a game. But then again, sometimes it is more than just a game. 

Isn’t that why I’m doing this in the first place?

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In the age of social media, it can be impossible to predict what makes headlines and what gets everybody talking and tweeting. 

I listened to Cyclone Fanatics’ coverage of Campbell’s Tuesday news conference on Tuesday evening. I wasn’t at all surprised when a reporter started to ask a question about Campbell’s goals for the season, including winning the Big 12 Championship, and Campbell interrupted the question. 

“Not me,” Campbell said. “That was never my goal. My goal has always been one thing, and that’s to become the best version of ourselves we can be. You’ve never heard me say that word once, you’ve only heard me talk about becoming the best version of yourself you can be. My challenge for this year’s team was to become the greatest together team in the history of Iowa State football. And so far, all of our goals are still in tact from a coach Campbell standpoint. Now, could our players have other goals and aspirations? Sure. Do I want them to have great goals and aspirations? Sure. But that’s not coach Campbell’s goal.”

I had listened to nearly all of Campbell’s Tuesday press conferences throughout the season, in addition to his interviews at the conference media day. I had heard Campbell speak a few times in more private settings. I had listened to a fair amount of his press conferences over his six-year tenure as head coach. The answer did not surprise me. In fact, any other answer would have surprised me. His delivery wasn’t as eloquent as it could have been, but the substance of what he was saying was completely consistent with his past messages. Messages like “trust the process” and be “outcome aware,” not outcome driven.

I thought it was interesting. I thought it was insightful to his thought process. I made a mental note that if I ever got a chance to talk with him, I wanted to dive into it further. 

I did not expect people outside the Iowa State sphere to pick up on it, and was surprised when I started seeing people on Twitter discussing it and debating about it. Somehow, Campbell’s message got misconstrued to be interpreted as he didn’t care about winning or somehow didn’t want to win the conference title. I couldn’t check Twitter on Wednesday without seeing the debate play out. It culminated in Fox and CBS sports commentator Brady Quinn saying on air that “I can’t believe he actually said that out loud,” and “It’s got to be bad for recruiting.” 

For what it’s worth, current and former players came to Campbell’s defense. If you’ve ever watched Campbell on the sidelines during a game, it’s hard for me to believe he doesn’t want to win. The point, as I read it, was that he wants his team to focus on doing the right things to be the best they can be. Do that, and more than likely the wins will come. More than likely the championships will come, when the time is right. It would probably be fair to say at times the Cyclones had not been the best version of themselves, which led to the team being in position to lose close games to teams the odds said it should have beaten. I would even bet Campbell felt the same way. (Though I had never questioned their heart.)

I’m not a “hot take” type of person. I’ll just say I was totally in Campbell’s corner on this one. Anybody who had been paying close attention to Iowa State football the past six years could tell that “The Process” had worked and led Iowa State to heights previously unimaginable. Everyone, including national media members, loved Campbell’s rhetoric when the team was the plucky underdog slowly working its way toward being a conference title contender, which is why every year he is speculated to take any number of other college or NFL coaching jobs. I’ll take my chances as a fan trusting the process.

His quotes and the ensuing controversy came at an interesting time for me in my journey. My strong hope, as a fan, was for Iowa State to win the Big 12 Championship. After the Texas Tech game, I had to come to grips not only as a fan but as an aspiring author writing about this season that it was not going to happen. I had a couple people tweet at me in mocking fashion. I heard that a local sports talk radio show jokingly blamed me for Iowa State’s disappointing season. I had to have my own gut check; Am I actually going to write a book about this season? 

The answer was always yes. It’s not the book I thought it could be. Campbell’s sentiments rung true in the sense that I knew I couldn’t judge the success or failure of this book on the results of the season, in large part because I had no control over those results, and also because I did this for the experience as much as the outcome. 

Everything about the trip to Norman reiterated this.

Before the season, when I told my family I was going to go to every game and write a book about it, my dad and brother both wanted to go to a road game with me. My brother chose the game at Oklahoma because it could have been a big game and because OU’s stadium is regarded as one of the better stadiums in the country. I was excited all season to experience this game with them, and by Thursday I was giddy at the prospect of taking the road trip to Oklahoma.

We left Friday morning. We stopped at a rest area in southern Iowa, where we saw some Cyclone fans. 

“Go State,” one of them said to us.

We went through Kansas City right in time for lunch, and stopped at Jack Stack Barbecue. I was used to having good luck at Jack Stack before Iowa State men’s basketball Big 12 Tournament games in KC, and it had also been good luck before Iowa State’s game at Kansas State. I was pulling out all the stops to make it a good luck charm again. (To be fair, it was still the day before the game, so I can’t really blame Jack Stack for the eventual loss.)

Throughout the drive, we talked about all things college football. Iowa State and Iowa, of course, but also the College Football Playoff system, other teams, national championship scenarios, and the like. College football has always been a topic that we could talk about for hours.

We were staying in Oklahoma City, about a half hour from the stadium in Norman. We arrived a little after 5, and my friend Jason and his crew arrived within five minutes of us. We checked in and grabbed spots at the hotel bar as those who didn’t know each other introduced themselves. Jason made quick friends with Kent and my dad, telling stories of his interactions with Iowa State athletes and swapping stories with us about our trips to Lambeau Field (even though Jason cheers for the wrong team in the Packers vs. Vikings rivalry). 

We went to dinner at a restaurant a few blocks away, Bricktown Brewery. Since it was a 45-minute wait, we grabbed spots at the bar. There were quite a few Cyclone fans in the restaurant, enough that Jason joked he should start a “Cyclone! Power!” chant. I briefly scrolled my phone and saw another Iowa State fan who I followed on Twitter was at the same place. A few minutes later, some people walked up to us at the bar. 

“Aren’t you the same people who we saw this morning at the rest stop?” one of them asked. 

“Yes! That’s awesome,” I responded. I asked what their names were, only to learn that the same person I had seen post on Twitter just minutes ago was the person I was talking to. What a great, random connection.

After dinner, Kent, my dad, Jason, his friend and I had a nightcap at the bar. Jason and I swapped more stories about Iowa State football and past memories. I later joked to Kent that he got a crash course in being an Iowa State fan just by listening.

The next morning, we woke up early. The game was slated to begin at 11 a.m., so we wanted to be on the road to the tailgate by around 7. As I was still waking up, I checked my phone. Kent had left a message for me — “Gameday!” — despite being in the same room. Tradition is tradition. 

The DFW tailgate was in the parking lot of the basketball arena. We parked and wheeled our coolers over to the tailgate. I found the club president who I had gotten to know over the course of the season and said hello. We set down our coolers and settled in. 

A few minutes into the tailgate, a man I thought I might recognize walked right up to me. 

“I know you, right?” he said. 

“I think so… who are you?” I asked.

It turned out it was someone from my hometown, Pella, who had been a year behind me in high school. We had both played in the marching band. He was also an Iowa State graduate, and his job had taken him to live in Oklahoma. A couple of friends had come to visit and go to the game with him. 

A little while later, another couple walked up to our group. I noticed they had a 12-pack of Old Aggie beer from New Belgium Brewing, which they quickly offered us. My wife, Paige, is originally from Fort Collins, the home of New Belgium. I immediately recognized the beer, which is named after Colorado State University’s former mascot, the Aggies. I learned that this couple lived in Fort Collins and had driven 12 hours to see Iowa State play in Oklahoma. I excitedly told them that my wife was from Fort Collins and we visit her parents there often. 

It was another reminder: Without this journey, these random encounters would not have happened. 

I could have tailgated for six hours, but game time was approaching. There were shuttle buses near us, but the sun had come up and the weather was beginning to feel nicer. We decided to walk the mile-or-so to the stadium. As we walked, we began to blend in with the thousands of OU fans also making the walk. Everyone seemed in good spirits. It was a picture-perfect day for college football. 

We weren’t sure exactly how far we had to walk to get to the stadium, and just as it felt like we were never going to get there, we could see it in the distance. The stadium lights extended high into the sky. It looked like it was just right there, but it was still a 15-or-so-minute walk away. 

Gaylord Family – Oklahoma Memorial Stadium opened in 1923. It is nicknamed the “Palace on the Prairie,” and I could see why. It looks like a massive building from the outside, and the brick façade gives it a historic feeling. When I was planning for the season, this was the stadium I was most looking forward to. When people talk about stadiums you “need to visit” as a college football fan, Memorial Stadium is usually on the list. 

Once we were inside, it lived up to the hype. The stadium holds more than 80,000 people, but fits them in snugly. For me, it felt comparable to Iowa’s Kinnick Stadium, which I have been to many times, and Kansas State’s Bill Snyder Family Stadium, which I had been to earlier in the 2021 season. It felt like the fans were right on top of the field and right up against the teams’ sidelines. The difference is that the stadium itself was larger and seated more people. Both sidelines had an upper deck, giving it a massive, imposing feeling. 

Our seats were on the sideline on the southeast side of the stadium, as close to the corner as you could be without actually being in the corner. We were 20 rows up, which felt much closer to the field than I had anticipated. I had purchased the tickets through the DFW Clubs, so fortunately Kent, my dad and I were in the midst of Iowa State fans. 

Everyone was in a good mood. The Iowa State fans seemed like they were there to have a good time, and I reveled in the fact that I was in a historic stadium getting ready to watch my favorite team.

Today can be our day, I thought. 

Iowa State got off to a great start. The Cyclones immediately converted a 3rd-and-7, aided by an Oklahoma penalty. They continued their march down the field until facing a 3rd-and-18 from the OU 26. Purdy passed to Joe Scates along the sideline. The play was directly across the field from us coming toward the endzone we were staring at. I cheered as I thought Scates had come down with the catch before seeing the referee call the pass incomplete. Before Iowa State could line up to kick a field goal, the referees blew the whistle to go review the play. On the stadium video boards, we could see what looked to be an ominous sign for Iowa State. It appeared Scates had come down with the catch and then fumbled the ball out of bounds through the endzone. We thought it was going to be a touchback and Oklahoma would take over possession, meaning Iowa State wouldn’t even get to try a field goal. However, “after further review,” the call was a catch, and Iowa State would retain possession at the 1-yard line. I couldn’t believe the call went Iowa State’s way. I wasn’t apologizing to anyone as Hall punched it in for the touchdown and a 7-0 Iowa State lead. 

“YEEAHHH!” I yelled with the other Iowa State fans around me. What a start!

It was short-lived. On Oklahoma’s second offensive play, freshman quarterback Caleb Williams, who had become a household name within the sport after taking the starting spot midseason, went back to pass and then took off up the middle. Before I knew it he was in wide open space running toward the endzone. Nobody was going to catch him as he completed a 74-yard touchdown. It felt like the old days when teams like Oklahoma and Nebraska seemed to make those plays with ease against Iowa State. It was now 7-7.

Iowa State answered with a drive near midfield, but was forced to punt. It worked out OK, as the Cyclones had taken more than five minutes off the clock forced Oklahoma to start the drive from its own 13-yard line. OU went three-and-out, and after a nice return by freshman Jaylin Noel the Cyclones started from their own 38. The teams traded punts again, and unfortunately this time the Cyclones were force to start at their own 10. Iowa State picked up a first down, and then faced a 4th-and-1 from its own 19-yard line. In an unusual move for anyone, and especially Campbell, Iowa State lined up to go for the first down rather than punt. It appeared Campbell was going to pull out all the stops to win. The decision paid off as Hall powered forward for a 2-yard run. Unfortunately Iowa State was forced to punt a few plays later. Still, Iowa State had again taken 5 minutes off the clock and was controlling the game. 

Oklahoma finally got things going, but was forced to settle for a 25-yard field goal… which clanked off the goalpost. 

“Ohhhhhh!” I yelled. 

The Cyclone fans were again feeling good. Missed field goals by the opponent always feel extra positive.

With just more than five minutes left in the first half, we decided to use the restroom before facing long halftime lines. I wished I hadn’t. 

The line was already long outside the men’s room. As we stood and waited, an Oklahoma fan struck up a conversation with us. He talked about how impressed he was with Iowa State’s effort, and wondered how this team lost to Texas Tech. I told him I had wondered the same thing. 

I turned to my dad. I was about to say, “You know, every time I go to the bathroom it seems like the other team scores.” It had happened at Baylor and it had happened at Kansas State, and during the West Virginia game the Mountaineers had started a touchdown drive before I got back to my seat. Iowa State had the ball, so it was unlikely Oklahoma would score while we are in line. Still, I didn’t want to jinx it.

“You know,” I said, and caught myself. “Never mind, I’m not going to say it.”

We could hear the radio feed in the restroom, and I could hear Iowa State making positive plays to drive down the field. 

Iowa State took the ball all the way to the 29 before disaster struck. Backup quarterback Hunter Dekkers came in for a trick play. He pitched it to Noel, who then turned around and threw it back to Dekkers. The problem was, Dekkers initially had pitched the ball forward, meaning there were two forward passes in one play. It was a penalty, and pushed Iowa State all the way back to a 2nd-and-24 at the 43. It was a momentum killer.

As the play was ending, we were on the concourse and had found a television playing the video feed. We watched the replay as the radio announcers gave their interpretation. The color analyst was unforgiving, wondering aloud how the coaching staff didn't know the play was illegal. I wondered the same thing, though ultimately suspected it was an execution error rather than a play-call error.

No matter whose fault it was, it was costly. Two plays later on 3rd-and-21, Purdy faced pressure. He got hit and sacked, and lost the ball in the process. Oklahoma's Jalen Redmond picked up the ball and ran it all the way to the endzone. Oklahoma had taken the lead with just 9 second left in the half. Iowa State was that close to going to the locker room tied. Instead it was down 14-7 on a backbreaking play.

It's probably as mad as I had been all season.

It struck multiple nerves. It was a fluky play born of the type of errors a team trying to pull a big road upset just can't make. It was opposite of Campbell's "win in the margins" philosophy. It felt, again, like the old days of watching those types of plays happen regularly in these types of games. And, it confirmed the worst fears of my own stupid superstitious brain.

As my friend Chris texted, "Some years... just ain't your year."

Yep.

We walked back toward our seats as the half was ending. On the inner concourse, the Fox Big Noon Kickoff team was setting up its halftime stage right next to us. I tried to put my anger aside for a moment and appreciate that Iowa State was even good enough to play in a game that got this type of media coverage.

I seethed during halftime and tried to get myself into a better mental state before the second half began. I talked myself into believing Iowa State could come back from this. A fan a couple rows in front of us helped out.

"Let's go! That play was a fluke. We're going to win this!"

I was back on the bandwagon, even more so when Iowa State forced a three-and-out on Oklahoma's first drive and then downed a punt at the 1-yard line. I saw the Iowa State fans in the endzone seats on the opposite end of the stadium stand. We were standing (as we had all game) and made noise to cheer on the ISU defense. On third down, Will McDonald forced a fumble in the endzone. Some days the ball doesn't bounce your way, and Oklahoma was able to recover the fumble and get out of the endzone. Still, Iowa State had forced another punt.

The Cyclones took the ball at their own 45, picked up a first down and faced a 2nd-and 2 at the Oklahoma 37. Iowa State failed to pick up a first down on the next two plays, and again elected to try a fourth down conversion. The Oklahoma defender timed the play perfectly, and Purdy’s quarterback sneak went nowhere. Turnover on downs, and the momentum was back on OU’s side. 

It took the Sooners little time to capitalize on it. OU drove into Iowa State territory and faced a 4th-and-3 of its own. Williams calmly rushed for four yards and a first down. Iowa State had no answer the  remainder of the drive, and we watched in dejection as Purdy walked right by our section and headed to the locker room with an apparent injury. Please don’t let this be the last time he plays, I thought. A few plays later, Caleb Williams found Mario Williams for a touchdown and 21-7 lead. Iowa State’s hopes were teetering.

I thought the game was over when the backup quarterback, Dekkers, came in the next series, felt the pressure and heaved a ball up for grabs that was intercepted by Oklahoma’s Delarrin Turner-Yell. 

Iowa State’s defense kept the game alive, turning around and forcing an interception by redshirt freshman Craig McDonald. We had reason to cheer for the first time in awhile. 

Dekkers came back out, and quickly faced a 4th-and-1, which he converted after recovering a fumble on the snap and finding his way forward for 2 yards. Thank goodness. The clock flipped to the fourth quarter, and Iowa State’s offense was stalled. Another punt was seemingly on the way, killing the momentum gained by the interception. Punter Andrew Mevis took the snap, and I almost laughed out loud as he faked the punt and ran right up the middle with no OU defenders around him for 29 yards. I tried to remember the last time I had seen Campbell run a fake punt or field goal, and I couldn’t. 

A few plays later, Dekkers faced another 4th-and-6, and this time threw it up to Hall, who reached out and made a spectacular one-handed catch. The next play he found Allen for a 12-yard touchdown pass as we finally had reason to put our hands in the air and high-five for the first time since the first quarter. 

Shortly after, Purdy ran back onto the field to loud cheers from the Iowa State fans in our section. Iowa State’s defense responded to the newfound momentum with a 3-and-out, and the Cyclones were back in business. Unfortunately, with Purdy back under center, the Iowa State offensive possession went nowhere, and the Cyclones were forced to punt the ball back. Kennedy Brooks took the first play of the drive for 26 yards, and ISU committed a facemask penalty to give Oklahoma another 15 yards all the way to the 27-yard line. The Sooner offense didn’t look back, picking up two straight first downs and scoring on a 7-yard touchdown run by Eric Gray to push the lead back to 28-14. With just more than five minutes to go, I felt like I had seen this movie before. The game was over.

That’s when my dad asked if I was enjoying the journey. I had so badly wanted this win, and it just wasn’t going to happen. 

I should have learned never to doubt this team. What happened next perfectly encapsulated why I chose this team to follow on this journey. It wasn’t because of what they accomplished. It’s because of who they were. 

Facing a 3rd-and-6, Purdy got the offense rolling. He found Xavier Hutchinson for a 15-yard gain, and then Kolar for a 28-yard gain (Kolar fumbled, and Tarique Milton luckily recovered the ball for Iowa State). Two plays later, Purdy again found Kolar for 14 yards, and then targeted Hutchinson on a play that drew a pass interference flag. From the 2-yard line, Purdy again threw to Kolar for the touchdown. It was now 28-21. With just under 3 minutes left, ISU had a chance, and I started to believe the Cyclones could do it.

Iowa State kicked off and sent its defense on the field. I joined my fellow Iowa State fans in yelling for them. They responded by forcing a combined loss of 6 yards in the first two plays, and then forcing Williams out of bounds well short of the first down. Iowa State used its second timeout after the play. We chanted “I-S-U! I-S-U!”

“Gosh, this team doesn’t win easy or lose easy,” I told my dad.

Iowa State got the ball back at the 14-yard line. If the Cyclones were going to do something epic, it would require a long drive. It mirrored the scenarios in the Baylor, West Virginia and Texas Tech games, but this time I just truly believed these guys were going to go down and score. 

Purdy found Kolar for gains of 11 and 20 yards to get things rolling, before taking a crucial sack for a loss of 9. Iowa State was forced to call its final timeout. On 2nd-and-19, Purdy’s pass to Hall fell incomplete. Two plays to gain 19 yards. Purdy threw it to Kolar again for a gain of 13 to make it a manageable 4th-and-6, and Oklahoma called timeout to let my nerves intensify for a bit. With the crowd roaring and the game on the line, Purdy again found Kolar over the middle for a gain of 16 as I cheered. It felt like this could be the drive we remembered forever.

“I’m telling you, this team doesn’t win easy or lose easy,” I told my dad again.

Now in Oklahoma Territory, Purdy again threw it to Kolar for a gain of 19 yards and another Cyclone first down. He ran up to the line and spiked the ball from the 21-yard line to stop the clock with 36 seconds left. 

“If they score, will they go for two?” My dad asked me.

“Yeah, I’m almost sure they will.” I wanted it so badly. I paused. “We need to score first.”

Purdy threw back-to-back incomplete passes. It was 4th-and-10. 

That’s OK. This season deserves another crazy fourth down conversion.

I felt irrationally overconfident Iowa State was going to convert. Purdy took the snap. I saw where he was going with the ball. Allen was over the middle. He was open. It was going to be a first down.

The ball sailed just a little to high. Just a smidge too high. Just out of reach. Just freaking out of reach. 

To add a little bit of insult to injury, an Oklahoma defender actually intercepted the pass. The OU fans let out a loud cheer as I said “OH!” and put my hands on my head. 

Just like in the Big 12 Championship game against Oklahoma the year prior, Iowa State fell just short of the game-winning drive. Just like the Baylor, West Virginia and Texas Tech losses, a couple inches could have made the difference. 

Williams came out and took a knee to run out the clock. I just stood and watched, unable to find the words as I watched the team jog off the field. 

“Close but no cigar,” my dad said, which could ultimately have been the motto of the season.

I was distraught. It’s the old cliché, “I wasn’t mad, I was disappointed.” Except, I wasn’t disappointed in anything the team had done or not done. I was disappointed that their effort, their heart, their character, hadn’t resulted in the big win like I so badly wanted it to, like so many Cyclone fans wanted it to. Like I’m sure they wanted it to. 

I kept standing, making no move to exit the stadium. I looked around. Many other Cyclone fans in both our section and in the section behind the endzone had seemed be doing the same thing. Everyone seemed numb. If, with five minutes left, the Cyclones had gone away quietly and lost by 14, we probably wouldn’t have felt the same level of heartbreak. That’s not who this team is, and I love them for it. 

Maybe it’s just a game, but it means more than that. 

Behind me to my left, the Big Noon Kickoff crew was setting up for its postgame show in the stadium. OU fans had gathered around and were chanting “Boomer! Sooner!” and other chants. After a few minutes, we finally decided it was time to head out. 

We ran into Jason on the way back to the car. The two of us dissected the game for a bit, including all the frustrating moments. At the end, we both came to the same conclusion. We loved the heart the team had shown. 

We got back to the car and ate some snacks as Jason and his crew left. A little while later I saw a parent of one of the players walk by, looking dejected. 

In his postgame comments, Kolar seemed to pour his heart out a bit in pointing out that even though Campbell and the team believe in following the process, the losses don’t hurt any less. 

But, “There’s no frustration between each other, it’s just we’re competitors and we lost twice in a row on either the last play of the game or one of the last plays of the game. We never die easy, but we find some crazy ways to lose sometimes. As the season ends, just trying to find ways to lay the foundation for the young guys because this program has a bright future.” 

The quote made me love Kolar even more.

There’s one more regular season game left. Thank God there’s one more game left. One more game to cheer on this team.

Campbell talks about “The Process.” Earlier in the season, Athletics Director Jamie Pollard reminded fans to enjoy the journey and not worry about the destination. Iowa State fell to 6-5 and 4-4 in the Big 12 with the loss. In terms of results, it’s a disappointment for a lot of people who have a lot more at stake than me. As a fan, and yes, as a fan writing a book, I wanted the journey to end with confetti. The moments along the way, both in enjoying watching my favorite team and immersing myself in the wider experience of being part of the Cyclone fanbase and everything it entails, in addition to creating lifelong memories with my family and friends, can’t be diminished. Just as I sincerely hope the moments and memories along the way, and the growth through “The Process” that hasn’t resulted in as many wins as desired, won’t be diminished for the players, or for the fans who want to fondly remember their time as Cyclones. 

To answer my dad’s question of “have you enjoyed the journey?” I haven’t enjoyed every minute of it, but I wouldn’t trade a second of it.

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